Tag Archives: dressing up

Doubt sets in

I have felt a little bit lost of late, creatively speaking. Musically I feel spent and somewhat abandoned. Solace seems to be coming from my Secret Poet project which excites me but deep down I know it is not the ideal way forward. Thinking I could fit in with the cabaret set was perhaps a misguided notion. Sure I am capable of a certain degree of glamour but my act isn’t even a proper act and it’s entertainment value or wow factor is perhaps non-existent. This became clear to me as I took to the stage as Anna for the first time. As fun as it was I always tend to be my harshest critic and like with my music performances I believe I may have been the least interesting item on the menu. I’m not sure how I can enliven it as jokes and banter are not especially easy for me. I did consider early on in the planning process that I could end on a song. Be it an extremely random cover version or some funny little ditty I have yet to compose. Having spoken with my wife and another friend I’ve came to realise that I rushed my performance. That’s normal I guess – I always remember the very first gig I did with my band when I was 17. We did our half hour set in 20 mins!

I have another week to prepare for it and at least this time I have more poems to choose from so I can be picky. I wish I had more like ‘Stuck in a dress’. It was pointed out to me that that is my pivotal work ie the one that goes the best with my image. I’m a guy getting stuck in a dress and isn’t it usually women who get stuck in dresses…oh the hilarity. Most of the other poems could be told without the hair and make-up as my normal self but not that one. I should think about it more over the next while.

I’m really looking forward to the gig as it’ll be a chance to hang out as Anna in a cool place with arty and open-minded people. In the back of my mind I’m also planning to get to take some pictures (posed of course) whilst there. Sick of taking the same pictures in the house so the Art School should provide a good opportunity for that. I took some new photos last weekend actually and some of them were rather good. Here they are below, the red dress and the blue dress are new purchases. Both from charity shops – I can’t resist a bargain 🙂

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These outfits are older but I was able to still find ways of enjoying them. For this part of the session I donned a trusty waist cincher and hip padding to lend a more feminine shape. It’s required especially for the sake of the bodycon dress which just goes up and down on my manly frame.

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Look what the cabaret dragged in!

So I actually did it! Last Friday I took to the stage and dramatically recited some poetry Anna-style. Filled with excitement and a little bit of terror it was all over in a flash…and then I got changed and we went home.

In my plans the previous week I had decided to get changed in work and walk to the venue which I estimated to be around 20-25 minutes away. It’s a cafe so it doesn’t have a backstage so reportedly the performers fight over the disabled toilet. (Funnily when I did get changed to go home there were remnants of the burlesque dancers strewn around; glitter and boa feathers. A colourful restroom indeed). And this I did! Echoes of the last night out reverberated in my mind only this time my confidence was a few notches higher. I spent less time getting ready than that previous ocassion, about 45 minutes. I had chosen the toilet nearest the exit I was intending to use and before leaving I slipped into my comfy ankle boots – well I wasn’t going to wear my good red pumps en route. Especially as it was bloody raining. Luckily I had my umbrella.

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The walk was very exciting as at the last minute my intended route changed. I was going to go a back way that would exchange a main road for something quieter but I thought what the hell! My umbrella would protect me. By the time I got to the Rio Cafe I must have looked a state. My eyeliner was running and I was rather warm but I soon climatised. My wife and her friend were already there and must have got a wee shock at coming face to face with the mad poet so soon. We had dinner and drinks and talked whilst many other folk arrived. I was really chuffed to see several friends turning up including my sister and her man. I think my set itself went well, there was applause and some laughter (which was intentional on my part). The ‘Stuck in a Dress’ poem went down the best I think. I could have done more but the well was dry and I dismounted the stage in a daze. One of my friends is a photographer and documented some of the proceedings. I had hoped to include some but haven’t seen them yet so I may include them in the next post. Here are a small selection – the lighting wasn’t very good sadly…

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Someone we know also did some HD filming and uploaded a compilation of the night to Youtube which you can view from here…

I can’t wait to do it all again! I’ve been working on some more material and working out what else I can wear. I reckon I’ll use different hair next time too – something that frames the face better. There’s no sign of another gig yet but I’m working on it. I had such a close shave that I took the opportunity to do some make-up practice the next morning. That’s my excuse and I’m sticking to it! I want to master liquid eyeliner you see, does it look okay?

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Thursday Morning Dress Up

Sometimes I wish I could write something a bit more meaningful than this. I got the chance to dress up today for a few relaxed hours and I had a really nice time. Simple stuff. No new outfits as it wasn’t pre-planned though I did get a new dark brown wig with a fringe the other day. Impulse buy, it was relatively cheap. So I dug into the wardrobe and pulled out a few old skirts I haven’t worn in ages and some tops to match.

The black skirt I’ve had for ages and the
houndstooth top is one of my favourites though it does make my boobs look a bit too big!

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The black top and grey skirt are old ones too. Rather tight fitting!

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I am liking the new wig though – it is rather tight though and hard to know if I have it on right. It’s also a bit darker than I would normally go.

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Hope you’ve all had a lovely Thursday! Let the clean-up operation begin (sighs)…

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Anna xxx

Raiders of the Lost Pics

Recently I discovered that my old MySpace is still there. I have no way of deactivating it as I no longer have access to the e-mail address I set it up with. It had been quietly sitting there gathering virtual dust all this time. I’m guessing it was around 2010 since I last logged in, the time of the last purge. Familiar faces greeted me from my Friends list but all posts and comments appear to have disappeared. I wonder what all those people are up to now and if they’ve abandoned their profiles for dead too. The reason I logged on was to have a look at some of my old pictures to see if they were still there. Indeed they were. I no longer have copies of them you see, having been overly careful down the years I would delete pics off the hard drive once I’d uploaded them. An idea I have been thinking over for some time is to sort out my Anna photo archive properly. From 2011 onwards I have a pretty comprehensive collection but the years prior to that are decidedly patchy. I had thought of maybe starting a Flickr account too. So I have somewhere to keep a back up but also have them on display for anyone who would appreciate them.

As often happens when you start looking at old photos I was transported back in time and thus lost track of it. I copied a fair few of them – not all though only the ones that looked okay. Some of them I had forgotten about and I cringed at some of the outfits and poses…

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I began to think again about why as crossdressers we photograph ourselves as we inevitably don’t get to share them much (god bless the internet). I suppose it’s not too odd because really as people we photograph everything we see, especially these days. We like to chart the progression of our lives and we like to remember. I’m particularly pleased with my archive, it’s pretty much a decade’s worth.

Pictures can also be incredibly powerful, funny, moving, thought-provoking and obtuse. Sometimes all at once. I happen to think the best ones are not always posed. I really like the pictures where the subject(s) are not necessarily aware that they are being photographed. No one else has ever taken a photo of Anna and I think I’d really like that. It would be terribly interesting to see how that would turn out. I’ve often wanted to ask my wife but have been too shy. When we did the now traditional Halloween Anna evening last night I wanted to ask but couldn’t find the right opportunity. I suppose I’m also a bit worried because when we were discussing my last post she remarked how I seemed to default to ‘sex kitten’ in them. It was a good point but that’s probably just because o my wardrobe choices. Put me in a cute skirt and heels I automatically bend or point my knees and turn my head to one side. I can’t help it 😄

I did take a few pictures before we settled down to watch a film. Ended up in that green dress I bought a couple of months back and I even accessorised!

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Hope you all had a great Halloween too! If I sort a Flickr out I’ll let you know X

New Green Dress(es)

Hello there! Hope you are all well 🙂

Things have been getting pretty busy for myself in recent weeks. We’re getting ready to move house and I seem to be having a gig explosion which means I’ve had to rehearse for them. I’m terrible at remembering lyrics but the potential audience’s unfamiliarity with my stuff could see me getting away with it. I also seem to be getting a lot of offers of musical collaboration but we’ll see what happens with them. With all this in mind I forewent a rehearsal on Tuesday to get all dolled up for the last time in this current house (hopefully I’ll get a chance at Halloween!).

I had some new purchases from a few weeks ago to finally experience in context, ie wig and full make-up. First off was this purple skirt which I got from 99p in a charity shop. Sadly the lighting doesn’t really show it properly. It was from Etam (remember them) so I guess that means it’s vintage now lol.

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The second item I’m rather fond of, a rare example of me paying full price for something from Primark. It’s an adorable green plaid dress with a peter pan collar and zip detail.

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The last one I enjoyed the most, it was only £2.75 from a charity shop. I paid an extra £1.50 for an emerald stone necklace but frustratingly can’t seem to unentangle it. I needn’t have bothered as it looks fine without it. I took quite a few pics with this so….here we go!

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This could definitely be the dress I wear if I have another night out any time soon. Hell this could be the impetus for one!

Before I packed it all away I decided to experiment with my corset and some hip pads to create the illusion of waist. It certainly looked and felt good but sadly doesn’t come across properly in the photos as the lighting got poorer.

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Have a lovely weekend! I’ll be venturing into cupboards discovering long forgotten artefacts “oh look – it’s the sandwich toaster” etc…

X

Mid-Week Dress Up Joy

I always wish I had more important or exciting things to write about. As it is though I cannot fully express the joy and excitement of a mid-week dressing session, especially one that takes place during the day lasting through to the night. I had managed to secure a half-day from work and decided to have a little jaunt round the shops. Aside from important stuff like wine, popcorn etc I was blessed with discovering some bargains. Firstly these 2 dresses both cost 99p from Barnado’s;

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The purple knitted one is very comfy indeed and I must have wore that for quite a while (it has pockets too, I love pockets).

As you can see I also did my legs and chest, a rare event indeed. Haven’t done my legs for about 7 months and it always makes a difference to the outfit not to mention that it ups the femininity factor. All of a sudden the skirts get shorter…

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That last skirt is one of my favourites, it managed to survive the last purge. It’s just so ridiculously short. I know it doesn’t really go with stockings but I don’t care!

The other bargain I secured was in Primark where I found a pair of nude heels for £3 in the sale. Upon taking them to the counter I ended up in a bit of banter with the assistant. She didn’t really think they were my style and I told her that I had an outfit that would go swell with them (a lie) so stop being so presumptuous. When the shoes scanned they showed up as £1! I could have done a wee dance but I restrained myself and expressed pleasant surprise. There’s a little ankle strap on them that I considered cutting off but actually it looks okay on.

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…my favourite view, I cannot lie!

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Mostly I lounged around – though I did put a washing on, hoover and do the dishes so I’m not a totally lazy bitch. I like to try and make the most of this time. That’s why I never just wear one outfit and I’m assuming other cds are the same. There was a dress I got my wife for Christmas years ago that she has relinquished to me that I rather liked, I tried that out to. It was from Joe Browns so it wasn’t exactly cheap.

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Finally what turned out to be the biggest surprise was a red dress I bought to wear at a Christmas gig last year*. I had never worn it with make-up and a wig before but I thought I’d give it a go because I was considering getting rid of it.

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I’ve changed my mind as you can imagine.

Before I go here’s a shot of my new ridiculous shoes on. I’m still not used to them yet as they are a bit big for me and I have to stuff them at the back so they don’t fall off!

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*I wear a dress and heels on stage with my band but I don’t go all the way. I get too warm on stage in normal attire so a full transformation would be out of the question.

Anna’s Alive!

So I survived intact after a night out as Anna. I’m not sure how to write about it but I do know I should keep it brief and vaguely interesting. I have read accounts of other people’s nights out and some have a tendency to overshare, delving into the minutae in excruciating detail.

This is how I looked after around 75 minutes of scrambling around in a work toilet…

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I think having someone else with me helped a great deal, the only real terror came when exiting the toilet and stepping out the main door. It was so damned windy and my hair immediately went to pot. I met my friend and we walked to the train station. On the way I was read by a couple of passing girls who screeched with what I can only assume was glee “tranneeee!”. That did make me chuckle. From then on though I was oblivious to any other such attention. In fact I feel I should thank everyone I came into contact with that night for not batting their eyelids and treating me as normal. Basically I just had to go for it and interact with people and it paid off. Having never really given Anna’s voice any thought prior to this, I thought it best to just speak a bit softer without being over the top scaling octaves like a mad man. It seemed to work.

We only had between 6 and 10pm to work with so we went to 2 places. First we had food at a place called ‘The Living Room’ and it was really nice and friendly. The waitress impressed me no end by asking ‘us ladies’ if we wanted a drink while we waited. Whilst there I also got to visit the Ladies Bathroom which has always been a mysterious place for me. I fixed my hair and make-up and a couple of other girls were taking selfies.

The next venue was a bar in the Merchant City of Glasgow called ‘The Riding Room’. Now this is defintely a place I’ll return to, in fact me and my friend are discussing the possibilities of this. I’ll try not to get too excited just incase. This was my first opportunity to go to the bar and I think I did alright. The barman even called me darling. In fact my friend was certain he was checking me out! Whilst there my boobs came a little undone so I had to visit the bathroom again to fix them – damn! On the way back up the stairs (for the toilets were downstairs) a man held the door open for me and said “after you hen” which quickly became another highlight. It was indeed sad to leave, though it could have got awkward as the place started to fill up with people and a couple of them I actually knew from the gig circuit. I curse myself now for not going over to say hello as they are arty types who would probably have appreciated the effort that went into such a transformation. Well that’s what I’m telling myself 😉

Back to the station we trudged. I got my man bag from Left Luggage and we popped to the toilets so I could change. Funnily enough I got shouted at while I was at the mirrors by an attendant. “You’re not supposed to be in here” he said, but I assured him I was a woman 5 minutes ago and he didn’t have a problem then!

I had the luxury of an empty house when I got home so I decided to make the most of it and got dressed again (what am I like?).

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Really glad I went out and I can’t wait to do it all again and hopefully with a bigger crowd (and for longer). I feel so blessed that I have great friends that are more than happy to go along with my tranny tendencies, I wish everyone had that.